Happy holidays!!!

HO HO HO
Merry Christmas to you all!!! =)

uppie datie

current location ----> sydney +.+
current local time ---> 0037

I learnt something new about myself yesterday when i went to the Sydney's famous Paddy's Market, it's those 'multi-market' where you could find veggies, meats, fruits, clothes and even imitation handbags!!!
Anyways, i didn't fancy too much about the market, it was packed with people and i realise the people here unlike Brisbane are soooooooooo rude!
It's so annoying when other people are always pushing you out of their way -.- without saying 'Excuse me' or 'Sorry'.. It really ticks me off. Why are they such in a hurry to get around?
I also hate it when people pull their trolleys happily and not watching where they pull or push to... and when it's filled with heavy groceries and runs over your toe, it bloody hell HURTS!! Some people realise they ran over people's toe/feet of they accidentally pushed and hit a person, but all they could do is just look and you then look away and happily walk away with their trolleys... =.=' SWEET move....
Despite the 'always in a hurry' people, i'm quite loving the site around Sydney. Took tonnes of cool pictures, but can't post it now, using my aunt's laptop and kinda hard to work around.
Pictures would be posted once i get back to Brissy!! =D

Love hugs and kisses!
Take care, miss you all!

All i Wish for Christmas

Christmas is the one holiday i really wished i could get what i want, but knowing that uni puts a huge burden on my parents, i dare not utter a word about this awesome guitar.
I fell in love with it upon first sight, i was practically drooling over it, but hell it cost too much. It's said to be $2199, it's more than i could fetch out. That one guitar could feed me for at least 4 months in Australia +.+
=) well dreaming about it ain't a crime right??
Maybe i should try my luck on lottery tickets? If i do strike, the first thing i do is get me an awesomely sexy guitar!! well if i strike big then i'll think about getting it.
For now it's just a dream, and i'm loving it.

Gibson Robot Guitar ^^

expectations

I don't understand why do you expect more than i could deliver?
Constantly trying to live up to your expectations, pushing myself beyond my limits.
The stress i bear upon my shoulders are piling even higher by the day. Crashing isn't an option, even if i have crashed you won't know, even if i did crashed and splat hard face first in front of you, you could never sense it. Failing is never an option for you, you think that failures are for the weak. Maybe i am one of the weak ones? But you just do not want to accept it, therefore you push me physically and emotionally not knowing the consequences you pressure upon me. You would never know even if you were granted 1000 years to figure out what's wrong with me and what or even who is causing it. You are ice cold to your bones.
I know my limits, and i know to what extend i could stretch it to. I stretch it in my comfort zone, but for you i'm willing to stretch it beyond what i could handle just to satisfy you. Everything revolves around you only.
You would never understand the meaning behind "Giving your best is what all matters"...

=)

Filled with frustration at first, but a light suddenly appeared in front of me. Slowly it guided me step by step forward. It's not even an option to look back, i charged with full speed like a huge sailing vessel.
It took me a few days to get my thinking gears moving, it refused at first, but i finally got it moving by kicking hard on it.
Was thinking and connecting the dots the whole day, till i got home and sat in front of the computer.
Started by doing some research online, taking down important and useful points and notes that i could use to score big in this assignment. As i proceed further and faster, adrenaline pumps through my blood vessels, i could feel the effect on my heart as it's beats races.
I lose my eyes, silently i listen hard and deep to my heart beat, feeling it's pulse and blood flow throughout my entire body. Excitement floods my inside, a smile involuntaryly appears on my face.
Instantly i could tell, this challenge sprinkles me with everything good =)

Exoposition
Structure 1 - Ribs (my choice)
Structure 2 - Right atrium of the heart

Assignment 1 - To find the relationship between both structures.
Assignment 2 - To find a different relationship between both structures.

too tired to put up a fight

I really wished you could support me rather than trying to proof that you would always be better than me all the time. Coming in second once in a while doesn't means that you are weak or you are the world biggest loser, it's just a number. But i can't deny that it's good to have a healthy competition once in a blue moon, but you as a ******* , should know when to stop being so competitive and be supportive. They are times when i wish you would stop bragging, it's those times where i need your support rather then listening to you talk about what a big shot you are. I am proud to know that you are smart and also to know you would be 'big' in the future. The pressure you put upon me is more than i could bear, i am not made of steel, in case you missed it, i'm human. No more than a normal human trying to live life the best i could.
Everyday i constantly have to live under your shadow, trying to compete with you for the lime light, no matter how hard i try, i get drifted deeper into the shadows.
No matter how hard i try and if succeed in being number one, without fail you would give some lame reason why you lost or all your excuses to protect your thick damn pride.
EGO, you are damn full of it. A fuel that you would never run low on.
Why can't you learn to accept that a man can't be number one all the time? Every man falls at least once in their life.
Don't ever ask me why i didn't told you how i felt and how it's affecting me, because you damn sure know that you would never hear me out, but instead you would throw your temper and i would be shredded inside out without mercy.
I have fallen on my knees, begging for mercy, let me go. Let me be as i am. I live without regrets as i know i gave and done my best in everything. But you're a very strong source, you make me not fall, you make me want to work my bloody arse of and try to be as good as you. I wish you would stop, it has done a lot of damage, more than i could handle, and if this continues, there is no guarantee i would have the strength to even fight for my life.
I'm too tired to put up a fight with you, as i'm already in war with my future constantly striving for a brighter one.

Life

How would life be if i wasn't born on the 23rd of March 1988?
What if i died in my mother's womb?
All i ever 'saw' was the inside of a human body, which i think won't be too bad.
The world is a cruel cruel place to live, it gets even worse by the second, minute, hour, day, week, month, year, decade, century, it would never be like how it used to be, some even irreversible. Racism, poverty, cancer, AIDS, global warming, evil, domination, drugs, etc.
With my presents now in this century, would i make a difference? 'Even a small voice makes a huge difference.' Is that so?? How true could it be? All i see and hear is that when someone 'big' tries to help the world, it is then being heard by the world. It doesn't seems to me that much people care about what a 'nobody' do.
I do donate to people who seek for donations, i give as much as i can, and wish for the best for everyone hoping i could help at least one person, give them hope and a new light to look forward to. But they are people out there who takes advantage, they are no more than mere frauds, how cold could their heart be to ask for donations stating to help the poor, or help monks or children? but in fact the money they collect goes into their own pockets???!!! Bloody useless people, using names of other unprofitable organization to satisfy their own greed. They've got all their limbs intact, why can't they find for jobs like others? Ungrateful people, why bother giving them limbs at the first place? I bet they are tonnes of people out there who would appreciate a working limb. People who blind could even work, why couldn't they??
Mad world this is, greed swallows the good of a person if not controlled properly.
They are even people who acts as a monk and selling 'religious' stuff to citizen, claiming that the profit would help build a temple or help feed a group of monks/kids/homeless.
It makes me feel sick to the stomach.
There's a lot more going on on this world, so much wrongs, more than the good.
Some times i wonder how would life be if i weren't born, would i be an angel? A guardian angel to someone? An angel to protect and guide.
=D it's just all a dream, with all my sins that i've committed (dissecting animals, burning fuel, cutting down trees, etc), i don't think i would ever get the chance to own a pair of wings.
One day i really wish to help change the world or even change a person's life.
To all my beloved friends, if you would all agree, we shall try to establish an organization to help people who really need our help.
With our tiny voices we shall send the world a loud message.
If can lah :P